Power Challenge 1: Think Before You Ask

We’re all in a hurry! There are only so many hours in the day, and we are just trying to make the most of them. As we try to be efficient, sometimes we do just the opposite. One of the biggest wastes of time at work — for everyone involved — is a poorly thought-out request.

For example, let’s say you are sitting in a morning sales meeting. During a lull, you lean over to quickly ask Carol, your employee, to prepare data and an internal report for a client meeting you’ll have later in the week.

Late that afternoon, you’re thinking about that same client meeting, and you zap a quick email to Carol to say you thought of a few more things for her to include.

What you don’t realize is Carol was just finishing up the task as you first requested it. With your new email, she re-works the report, staying after hours to finish it… only to find yet another email from you the next day, asking for more research items to put in the report!

A Waste of a Day

The result? Carol wasted almost an entire day working on a request that you kept changing mid-stream. She is frustrated and just a bit angry — and rightly so.

Instead of asking Carol for the report while you were distracted during the meeting, you could have given her a “heads up” that you needed assistance and would be sending details later that day. This way she would have known it was coming and could have scheduled time in her day to meet your request.

Then, in the quiet of your office, you could have fully thought through exactly what you wanted to accomplish at the client meeting — including all the information and materials you would need to meet that goal. At that point you would have been ready to make your request. This would have saved her time and eliminated unnecessary frustration.

The first step is to be clear in what you are asking; take the time to think about what you want. Then, check back periodically to see how things are going and provide more direction as needed.

Power Challenge 2: Know What’s Being Asked of You

On the other hand, have you ever been like “Carol” above, the victim of having your goalpost moved by someone else? Have you ever been frustrated with someone who asks you to do something, and before you can even get it done, they call and change their mind about what they want you to do? Or they say, “Thanks, but this isn’t what I wanted. What I really wanted was…” Or how about when the request isn’t clear, and you make the wrong assumptions?

Don’t Just Sit There; Say Something

Here’s what you can do. The next time this person — let’s call her Gina — asks you for something, have her repeat the request. Often, the act of restating will help Gina realize she hasn’t fully thought out what she needs. She may do a better job defining her request the second time around.

As well, ask questions for clarifying the request:

• Would you mind going over that one more time?
• Sorry, could I ask you to tell me that (piece of information) again?
• Could you clarify what you meant by (challenging word)?
• Just a second, could I get a little more clarification on (X topic)? I just want to be sure I understood.
• Could you be more specific?

It’s also useful to repeat Gina’s request back to her before the end of the conversation. And, when you don’t understand a request, it’s okay to say so. You can say, “I didn’t quite catch that,” or “I didn’t get that.” This shows you are listening.

Finally, it’s always good to recap with an email, whether the request was made in person, by e-mail, text or phone. Your email should include:

• An acknowledgement of the request
• A summary of the deliverables detailed
• A timeline for delivering

Remember, sometimes people do not express their ideas clearly, or they ramble, so it’s always good to confirm.

Power Challenge 3: Solidly Plant Your Own Goalposts

How often do we not take the time to enjoy our own successes? We work hard to meet a goal, but we then don’t take even a minute to say “good job,” or pat ourselves on the back.

Instead, we immediately expand our original goal to include the next thing on our list. We think it’s too early to celebrate, too early to say we’re done. We tell ourselves to do just this one more thing, and then we’ll have met our goal. It’s endless!

We Just Plow Ahead

We lose out on savoring a sense of accomplishment; we miss taking a moment just to breathe. We don’t allow ourselves that freedom. We just plow ahead — adding things, checking things off, and then adding more things to our ever-growing list of to-do’s.

I used to be incredibly guilty of moving my own goalposts. I kept pushing my definition of success. My goalpost started with going to college. Then it expanded to getting a job. Then a better job. Then on to buying a house, having kids (not just one, but four), starting a business, growing the business… and on and on, with a million little things in between.

My goals were good goals! Nothing wrong with them at all. The problem was that I lumped them all together instead of regarding them as multiple goals. I kept moving my goalpost.

The Real Truth

I couldn’t admit success. I told myself, “If I just do this next big thing, THEN I’ll be successful.” The truth is that success isn’t just one thing. It’s made up of a lot of little, big and not-so-big successes. Not understanding that, I caused myself a lot of stress and anxiety.